À conversa com Ana Catarina Silva!
Mais uma Mãe com M grande e com uma história inspiradora.
A Ana tem uma filha com Síndrome de Peters e explica como é ter um filho que é igual a todos os outros, apenas necessita de um pouco mais de atenção! ❤
Leiam a entrevista que vale a pena.
Entrevista
Aos Pares: Qual foi a sua reação quando soube que estava grávida?
A: Um misto de alegria e alguma “ansiedade” por pensar que alguma coisa poderia correr mal durante a gravidez (eventual aborto, por exemplo)… E também ansiedade por aguardar que passasse mais tempo e esperar que chegasse perto das 12 semanas (devido à probabilidade de risco elevado de aborto nas primeiras semanas, sendo que, as coisas podem acontecer após as 12 semanas…).
Aos Pares: Sempre desejou ter mais que um filho, qual o seu número ideal?
A: Sempre disse que gostava de ter 3, e 3 rapazes! Mas a vida quis que fossem 2 meninas ☺
Aos Pares: Quando e como soube que uma das suas filhas precisava de mais atenção?
A: No dia em que íamos ter alta hospitalar (3 dias após o nascimento). Fizeram o teste aos olhinhos e foi diagnosticado glaucoma congénito bilateral que depois se veio a revelar num Síndrome de Peters. A pediatra informou-me que seria algo para o resto da vida e que a Maria Rafaela teria que fazer várias cirurgias e que o prognóstico era reservado. É algo genético e não sabemos a “qualidade” com que a Maria Rafaela vê. Neste momento, tudo está a ser feito para baixar a pressão intra ocular (já conta com 5 cirurgias em 6 meses) e várias consultas (para além das consultas “normais”) desta fase.
Aos Pares: As suas gravidezes correram bem? Alguma recomendação para as grávidas?
A: Sou uma sortuda por ter gravidezes “santas”! Nada de enjoos, só houve alguns alimentos que durante uma fase não conseguia mesmo ingerir. De resto correu tudo bem! Na primeira gravidez fiz zumba (com os devidos cuidados) e na segunda gravidez fiz pilates (e em ambas as gravidezes tentei sempre fazer caminhadas). Sou apologista de passar a fase da gravidez com desporto à mistura (para quem pode). Acho que o exercício é fundamental, também para nos sentirmos melhor física e psicologicamente! Roupa confortável (como passei a gravidez no verão usei muitos vestidos!) As calças de grávida são excelentes (também as utilizei no pós-parto para me sentir melhor). Muita água e aproveitar ao máximo a barriga que deixa sempre saudades ☺☺☺
Aos Pares: O que levar na mala de maternidade?
A: Não é preciso levar muita coisa!! O pai ou família pode levar o que for preciso quando forem as visitas. Soutien de amamentação, pomada para mamilos, concha para mamilos, vestido de noite, chinelos e produtos de higiene pessoal. Para o bebé, manta, fraldas descartáveis (algumas, o pai depois pode levar mais consoante for necessário), produtos de higiene bebé ou então utilizar os do hospital (que também são bons), fralda pano, body´s e baby grows.
Aos Pares: Quais são as tuas rotinas diárias como Mãe e mulher?
A: Os meus dias são sempre diferentes, pois não tenho dias “fixos”. O pai tem horários rotativos e basicamente organizamo-nos semana a semana, conforme os horários dele. Mas posso dizer que a mais nova vai ficando nos avós (em Setembro irá para a creche) e a mais velha vai para a creche e depois ou os avós ou o pai vão buscá-la à tarde. Com dois filhos é necessário ser ainda mais organizado para o trabalho doméstico “não descambar”. Tento ser o mais arrumada possível para não ser o “caos” (isto não quer dizer que tenha a casa sempre arrumada, apenas tento eheh). Quanto mais se deixa por fazer, mais trabalho depois se tem. Por isso, prefiro sempre ir fazendo o máximo que conseguir de forma a que as coisas estejam sempre o mais “orientadas”. O pai é o cozinheiro, mas quando ele não pode, há que ser o mais prático possível e o tempo não chega para tudo! Dividimo-nos bastante entre uma e outra (a Maria Rafaela está com 8 meses e a Benedita 2 anos)! Por agora, os meus “momentos”, como fazer uma caminhada, estão “de lado”, mas daqui a uns tempos espero regressar à rotina “antiga”.
Aos Pares: Consegue conciliar a vida de Mãe com o trabalho?
A: Felizmente tenho a “sorte” de poder trabalhar alguns dias através de casa (vivo longe do local de trabalho, antes da chegada da Maria Rafaela, fazia 4 horas em transportes todos os dias), o que, para quem tem filhos, não é exequível. Com esta facilidade, tudo fica muito mais “suportável” e sinto que tenho equilíbrio entre a vida familiar e laboral, o que faz com que também me sinta bem psicologicamente, pois sinto que consigo ter tempo “para os dois lados” (tanto para o trabalho como para a família).
Aos Pares: Qual o papel do Pai aí em casa?
A: Um pai que é PAI! Desempenha o papel dele ☺ Super presente e que faz basicamente tudo o que uma mãe faz (excepto dar de mamar ☺ ). Sempre muito à vontade com as miúdas e muito brincalhão também ☺
Aos Pares: Qual o episódio mais divertido e o mais caricato que teve com os seus filhos?
A: O episódio mais divertido… Quando estamos num jantar em casa de amigos e ela vai ao WC buscar o piaçaba para brincar!!! E um dia também tirou a fralda e fez cocó no chão da sala!!
Aos Pares: Qual o maior susto que apanhou como Mãe?
A: Aqueles milésimos de segundo em que deixamos de ver os filhos!!! A Benedita é uma criança que “foge” de nós, e por vezes quando achamos que está ao nosso lado, já está noutra ponta! Outro susto que para nós agora já não é susto… é quando choram… e fazem apneia (quase que ficam roxos!) As minhas duas bebés tinham muito esse hábito e no início era “assustador”!…
Aos Pares: Qual o seu maior desejo e o seu maior medo como Mãe?
A: Não pretendo ter filhas super inteligentes nem com profissões “extraordinárias”. Só espero que sejam felizes e que saibam agradecer o que têm na vida. Saibam aproveitar o bom de cada momento e que sejam unidas ☺
Aos Pares: Como gosta de passar o seu tempo em família?
A: Passear! Nem que seja fazer uma caminhada depois de jantar para “apanhar ar”, faz bem às crianças e aos adultos também! E quando é possível, estarmos os 4 a brincar em cima da cama ☺
Aos Pares: Os filhos dão-nos muitas alegrias, qual a maior que teve?
A: Chamar “mãe”, aquele abraço e aquele sorriso quando nos vêem ☺
Aos Pares: Recomendações pós-parto?
A: Muita “paciência”, para a maior parte das mulheres pode ser desesperante (eu que o diga que não tive pós-partos “fáceis”). É normal chorar, é normal ter dúvidas! Felizmente que é só uma fase! Que tenham muita ajuda (jantares “preparados”) e ter quem trate da casa porque os primeiros tempos, principalmente quando é o primeiro filho é arrebatador. Vivemos 24h para o bébé e temos tendência a esquecermo-nos de nós mesmas. É importante continuar a ter cuidado com o corpo (colocar creme) e também ter espaço para cuidarmos de nós (são os pontos, é a subida do leite, peitos a explodir, é uma hemorróida, são os mamilos gretados, é o “não” conseguir fazer cócó)… Beber muita água!!! Não desesperar! E filtrar a informação que ouvimos dos outros… Cada caso é um caso! E cada bébé tem os seus “quereres”. Por vezes, esquecemos que o companheiro está ali ao lado, mas nem que seja um simples gesto de um abraço ou dar a mão, para demonstrar que estamos ali. Para os companheiros, não é fácil o pós-parto e é uma fase que a mulher precisa ainda mais de carinho e companheirismo! Devem ser “empáticos” e perceber que são alterações físicas, psicológicas e de rotina! E que a mulher também tem que se adaptar a estas mudanças…
Não esquecer de comer, no início esquecia-me de lanchar, por exemplo, e passava muitas horas sem comer, e devemos estar alimentadas, porque quando estamos com fome a paciência “decresce” e ficamos mais facilmente “irritáveis”.
Aos Pares: Quais as maiores dificuldades que já teve como Mãe?
A: Deixar a Benedita para ir para o hospital com a Maria Rafaela… Lidar com a frustração de não poder ir a um baptizado ou a um casamento de amigos porque estão doentes (basicamente deixamos de fazer aquilo que nos “apetece”) e parece que só no próprio dia é que conseguimos confirmar se estaremos presentes ou não… Outra “dificuldade” que vejo como mãe é a capacidade de lidar com a privação de sono e birras/choro. Ao fim de algum tempo, começa a ser extenuante a privação de sono e ter que lidar com birras constantemente. Há que respirar fundo muitas vezes…
Aos Pares: Programa perfeito com os filhos?
A: Ir ao parque, ir passear até à praia, passear de triciclo, ir andar nos carrosséis… Basicamente tudo o que tenha a ver com “sair de casa”.
Aos Pares: Recomendações para Mães com crianças que precisam de mais atenção, com necessidades especiais?
A: Que tenham também tempo para elas! Felizmente o caso da Maria Rafaela não é “grave” (é “apenas” a nível ocular), existem situações bem mais complicadas, de mulheres que por vezes têm que deixar de trabalhar para cuidar de um filho. Não tenham medo de solicitar ajuda, os psicólogos servem para alguma coisa ☺ Que tenham alguém com quem possam desabafar! Existem alturas que estamos no “fundo do poço” e todos esses sentimentos são normais. No meu caso, foco-me nas coisas boas! Temos de ir recarregar baterias a outro lado, nem que seja um café rápido com uma amiga, uma caminhada, o que for que nos faça “deixar de pensar” nos problemas por uns instantes! É importante não nos esquecermos que antes de sermos mães, também somos companheiras, também somos filhas, também somos amigas! E devemos continuar a fomentar essas relações.
Aos Pares: Ser mãe é…
A: É uma mudança na nossa vida, no início podemos não nos “aperceber”, mas tudo aquilo que “deixamos de lado”, faz com que tenhamos que mudar!… É uma constante aprendizagem, é sair da nossa zona de “conforto”. É deixarmos de ter tempo (pelo menos durante uns tempos…) para nós! Tenho esperança que com o passar do tempo as coisas fiquem mais “facilitadas” e que daqui a uns tempos já consiga fazer outras coisas de que também gosto! É um desafio enorme, é uma logística brutal (ainda para mais com as constantes consultas da Maria Rafaela), é sorrir, é chorar… É ser pragmática e tentar não “endoidecer”!!! Existem dias menos bons, mas os bons, superam esses ☺ E quando tivermos um dia mau, pensar que amanhã será um novo dia! E nunca estar parada, porque há sempre alguma coisa para fazer! É aproveitar cada momento pois crescem bastante rápido ☺ Ser mãe também é pensar em 1000 coisas ao mesmo tempo e perceber que o cérebro já não é o que era (querer dizer alguma coisa e a palavra não sai da boca… e esquecer de coisas, ou já não lembrar do que estava a falar! Creio que já perdi muitos neurónios eheh ☺☺☺ )
Obrigada! <3
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